goodbyes

I recently discovered how much I dislike goodbyes. The ones that mean too much, and are uneasy, the ones that are indefinite and unclear. If you are reading this, then you already know me, and if you know me then you are well aware of the fact that I am not a terribly emotional person. I have noticed that the older I get, though, the more sensitive I have become. I said goodbye recently to a dear friend of mine who I have had in my life since Kindergarten. She left to Isreal to be married and begin her new life halfway around the world from her roots and her family. I am so happy for her, but it was certainly not an easy thing to do to say goodbye, fully knowing that it is so unclear when we will see each other again. On the other end of the spectrum, there are some goodbyes that need to be said that I am avoiding. Like the opening song on my new playlist, "I guess it's gonna have to hurt, I guess I'm gonna have to cry, and let go of some things I love to get to the other side. I guess it's gonna break me down, like falling when you're trying to fly. It's sad that sometimes moving on with the rest of your life STARTS WITH GOODBYE." I am at that type of emotional crossroads in my life where I realize that this particular person in my life is hurting me far more than helping me. And I know what I need to do, but it's so hard for me to say goodbye; he is another dear friend who is very close to me.